


Another 12x03 Coda

by Piper_Halliwell1979



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Coda, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss, Love Confessions, M/M, Season/Series 12, Smoker Cas, Smoker Dean, Supportive Castiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-03
Updated: 2016-11-03
Packaged: 2018-08-28 21:19:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8463304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Piper_Halliwell1979/pseuds/Piper_Halliwell1979
Summary: Cas senses Dean's distress after Mary leaves and they both admit to feelings left unspoken for too long.





	

Sam was the one to storm off to his room. He'd been through so much in just over a week. For two days he mourned his brother's ‘death.’ He endured physical, mental, and yeah he was counting her spell as sexual abuse. He got the mother he was cheated of knowing and then she was just...gone. 

 

As much as he wished he could seek comfort from his brother, he knew it would only keep Dean from processing his own emotions. He'd shove them down to focus on being the patriarch, the caregiver, as he’d done all his life. He locked himself away and pulled out his phone. He needed a friend and he considered Jody Mills the best one he had outside of Cas.

 

Dean fell into a sort of shock. He wanted to cry but couldn't. He looked around for something to break or hit but his body told him he didn't have the strength for it. He couldn't get his legs to carry him to the kitchen to pull the half bottle of vodka from the freezer. He dropped to a chair and just stared out into the silence.

 

_ Fuck this. Gotta get out of here. _ He willed himself up and made it to the garage. He couldn't even look at his Baby right now. He took an old Buick instead. He flipped through stations until he found some alternative rock. The classics wouldn't do. He needed the angsty music from his teens, some Gen X radio. Soundgarden hit the spot.

 

It was just a quick trip. His instinct was to turn right so he turned left instead. Mary was so much like him that he figured he’d come upon her hitchhiking if he went right. There was at least a gas station where he was headed.

 

The electronic bell sounded as he entered the building. It was the type of place only locals came to. Plenty beer in the fridge and locally made venison jerky at the counter. Depressing country music from way back in the day played overhead. Dean grabbed a case of beer from one of the coolers and told the old dude wearing a tag that read ‘Herb’ he’d take two packs of Marlboro reds and a lighter. He grinned at being carded. “Sign says under forty, son,” Herb pointed.

 

With his bad decisions purchased he headed home. He pulled the car around to a spot on the grounds instead of into the garage. He placed the beer on the trunk and hopped up beside it. He tapped a pack on the heel of his hand a couple times and ripped off the plastic. 

 

The first drag burned like he knew it would. How long had it been? Since Lisa? He smoked at work just for the extra breaks and because he couldn’t exactly go out and kill something to deal with stress. He supposed slowly killing himself would have to suffice.

 

His phone vibrated in his pocket. Probably Sammy wondering where he was.  _ Nope. _

 

“Cas?”

 

“Dean. I sense your distress. I’m calling to let you know I'm heading home.”

 

He took a long drag and flicked the ashes at the ground. “Distress is one word for it. How’d your lead on Lucifer pan out?”

 

“By the time we got there Rowena had banished him to somewhere at the bottom of an ocean.”

 

“Rowena? What the hell, man? You were supposed to call for backup.” Dean tossed the butt into the wet grass and shook another from the grass.

 

“I had unexpected backup. Crowley was pursuing the same lead.”

 

Dean switched the phone to speaker so he could open a beer, cigarette dangling from his lips. “At least your dick brother is twenty thousand leagues under the sea.”

 

A brief silence. “You avoided the subject, Dean. What's wrong?”

 

He sighed. “Mom left. Said she wanted her husband and kids back and walked out on us.”

 

“I’m coming home.”

 

“Cas...yeah. Come home. I need you.”

 

“I’ll be there soon.”

 

***

 

Cas was about to part ways with his demon but after his conversation with Dean he asked for a favor.

 

“I need you to take me home. My wings...they have not recovered as of yet.”

 

“Trouble in paradise?”

 

“Family matters I must tend to.”

 

“Click your heels together three times…”

 

“Just do it, Elphaba,” Cas rolled his eyes. He was outside the bunker in a flash.

 

Dean was halfway through what looked like his second beer when Cas walked into view. He exhaled bitter smoke and discarded another cigarette. “Thought Angel Air was grounded,” he called out.

 

Cas joined him. He took of his suit jacket and tie, tossing them through the open window of the car. He rolled up his shirtsleeves and helped himself to the beer Dean silently gestured at. He leaned back against the trunk.

 

“Demon Air still works.” Cas took a pull from the longneck bottle. He'd grown accustomed to the taste after his years spent with the Winchesters. 

 

“Mind if I smoke?” Dean shook another from his pack. He never did anything in moderation. He suspected he’d burn through those like he did booze. He offered one to Cas on instinct. He was surprised that he took it. He lit Cas’ first like a gentleman.

 

Cas puffed without coughing. “Jimmy smoked. Well, he quit before Claire was born but he snuck a few from Amelia. I find it works as a conversation starter when I must question someone in a non-formal setting.”

 

“Learn something new every day, Cas. I like that. After all this time we still got stuff to find out about each other. Guess that's what happens when you stick with your family.” Dean heard the bitterness in his own voice at that. 

 

“I believe she’ll come back. You were worried about overwhelming her but this world...it isn't hers. I know how it feels to suddenly be thrust into a life I’d never truly known.”

 

“Yeah, well, I should be used to people walking out on me by now. Sammy walked away. I dragged him back in. Twice. Dad left.” He shrugged his shoulders. “ _ You _ left.”

 

Cas felt a twinge of guilt. “I came back. I always come for you.” He stomped out his smoke and grabbed another beer. “Consider it the ebb and flow of a tide. The ocean is constant but the shore changes. Your family is constant. You may not always have us under one roof but we are still Winchesters and we still love you.”

 

Dean fumbled and dropped his bottle. The amber liquid turned to foam on the ground. “You love me?”

 

“Of course I do.” Cas twisted a cap and handed Dean a fresh beer. “I suppose I always have, though I struggle at times to define it. Love was a command to angels. You were my choice.”

 

Dean’s stomach knotted and he lost the taste for his beverage. The words were there, caught somewhere behind the lump in his throat. He felt it. He wanted to say it. “I’m scared, Cas.”

 

The angel reached over and gently squeezed Dean's knee. “I know you love me. I know why you hold back. If I were different…”

 

“Cas, no. I mean yes...no. Fuck.” Dean slid off the trunk and positioned himself in front of Cas. He slid his arms around Cas’ waist and held them close together. He was always better with actions than words. He rested their foreheads together and and gently nuzzled his nose against Cas’. 

 

Cas tilted his head up to seek Dean’s lips. They were so close. He breathed in the ghost of smoke and salt of the beer as Dean’s lips parted. Tips of tongues met and Dean was  _ kissing  _ him. He brought his hands up Dean’s chest to wrap around his neck.

 

Dean pulled him even closer, grinding his hips into Cas. Soft moans came low from Cas’ throat and Dean felt something hard pressing back at him. He reluctantly pulled away. “I want this. I want you, just like this. I’m afraid of losing you, Cas. Everybody I love leaves me.”

 

“Say it, Dean,” Cas whispered against Dean's lips. “I’m never leaving you.” He pressed forward again. 

 

Dean sighed into it. He was done with excuses. He was tired of running from himself when all it did was take him further from the man he fell in love with. “I love you, Castiel. I love you so much.” The tears he couldn’t shed for his mother now ran hot as he buried his face into Cas’ neck. “Please don't leave me. Please don't leave me.” Cas just held him. 

 

The sun had started slipping below the horizon and there was a slight chill in the breeze. Dean shivered in Cas’ arms. “We should go inside.” Cas suggested. Dean sniffled and nodded. He snagged the two packs of Marlboros and Cas took the beer. He could move the car tomorrow. Right now he just wanted to curl up against Cas in his bed and sleep until he could wake up without his chest aching.

 

Sam was in the kitchen. He had the bottle of vodka Dean bypassed earlier in his hand. “Hey, Cas. When’d you get back?” 

 

“A little while ago. Dean and I were outside talking.”

 

Sam gave a weak smile. “That’s good, Cas.” He looked over at his brother. “Talking’s good. I uh...I spent awhile on the phone with Jody. She said she'd reach out to Mom if she could.”

 

Dean kept his eyes down. “Good call.” He shoved his smokes into his pockets out of view. Sam didn't know about that particular vice. “Look, Sammy...I can't. I’m not…”

 

Sam gripped the back of a chair. “No, I get it. You remember her. I don't. All I have is a week’s worth of memories and it sucks and it hurts but I know it's different.”

 

Dean silently moved past Cas to give his baby brother a hug. They patted each other's backs and Dean retreated to his bedroom. Cas gave him a look as if to assure him he’d be there shortly. He wished to have a moment with Sam.

 

“How are you, Sam?”

 

“Not good, Cas. How's Dean?”

 

“Not good, either.” Cas sat across from him. “They are very much alike, Dean and Mary. They avoided talking to each other and now they probably believe they are disliked by one another. This...distance...it's only making it worse.’

 

“But he’s talking to  _ you,  _ right? That's pretty big.”

 

“The nature of our relationship has changed.”

 

Sam looked confused then, “Ohhhh...so you and Dean are  _ together _ ?” He allowed himself a real smile. “That’s awesome for you guys.”

 

“I am still here for you, Sam. You are my brother.” He held out his arms for the big man to fall into them. It had taken a long time for their hugs to go from forced and awkward to warm and comforting.

 

“I feel the same way about you, Cas. Now go take care of your boyfriend so I don't have to spend half the night hiding booze from him.” He kissed Cas on top of the head. He smiled at the angel and watched him walk down the hall to Dean's room. He picked up the vodka and slid it back into to freezer, choosing to grab a couple beers from the fridge instead.

 

**_Sam:_ ** _ I think Dean's going to be okay. He's got Cas. Like  _ has _ Cas. _

 

**_Jody:_ ** _???  _

 

**_Sam:_ ** _ Cas just told me _

 

**_Jody:_ ** _ It's about damn time. Should I tell Claire? _

 

**_Sam:_ ** _ Nah. Let them do it when they're ready. _

 

**_Jody:_ ** _ You gonna be okay? _

 

**_Sam:_ ** _ Yeah, Jody. I think I will :) _

 


End file.
